This is a comedy RANT about what the hell is going on with GameStop and Wall Street and where do we go from here!
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- You know some shit is going down when someone starts off their videos with a disclaimer
- I’m not a financial adviser and this isn’t financial advice. As of today I don’t own shares of GameStop, I do own shares of AMC and lawyers please sue someone with more money.
- GameStop, AMC theaters, Robinhood, Dogecoin. It sounds like the booths at a convention for adult virgins
- So why is it Wall street’s worst nightmare
- Buying low and selling high is the cornerstone of every day trader and drug dealer alike.
- This is called a “long” position.
- Well, the opposite of that is called a short position
- Something I know all too well about *wink* *wait what*
- It’s when you sell high and buy low…
- The tricky part is when you need to sell something you don’t own.
- It’d be like me selling you good genes and a decent hairline
- So like my future toupee, you’re going to need to borrow what you need from someone else.
- So you borrow a stock from someone, sell it at the current high price, and then once the stock goes down, you buy the stock at the cheaper price and give the stock back to the person you originally borrowed it from.
- It’d be like borrowing Johnny track shoes, selling them to steve for $100 dollars, then watching steve run what he thought were going to be hurdles, but ended up being bear traps, then buying the shoes back from steve for $5 because he has to pay his medical bills and what good are track shoes if you don’t have legs.
- Then giving the shoes back Johnny, and keeping $95 in profit
- This is what shorting is, except, instead of legoless steve, it’s companies that are limping to the finish line
- GameStop as a company sucks.
- It’s really an archaic way to buy video games now.
- Everyone downloads them.
- Everytime you trade in or sell a game there, they rip you off so much you feel like you’re selling stolen manhole covers for scrap metal.
- The company’s been bleeding cash for years. And hedge funds, the people primarily shorting stocks, know it
- They’re like sharks circling a wounded seal, or Chris Christie around a dessert table
- 138% of GameStop stock was being shorted.
- So there was more short demand than there was actual stock
- It’s like the warriors in 2016 finals, they’re up 3-1 and they think they’ve got it in the bag!
- Then come the LeBron James of Cat shirts
- GameStop’s incredibly White Knight
- A guy by the name Roaring Kitty on youtube and Deep Fucking Value on Reddit.
- This guy sees this as an opportunity and dumps in $53k, his life savings on GameStop
- That’s like reserving the presidential suit on the titanic, while Rose is knowingly murdering Jack and watching more and more of his life slip away with every frozen breath
- But what wasn’t accounted for was, the hate people have for hedge funds.
- That’s where the reddit community wall street bets comes in
- GameStop memes get shared, people start buying stocks and little by little… the price of the stock starts going up
- These hedge funds bet that the stock was going to go down and it didn’t
- And remember, they have to return the stock to the people they originally borrowed it from
- As the stock keeps going up, they’re losing money because they have to buy the stock back at the new current price
- Now this is when the ride gets wild
- As people see this stock climb and climb and hedge funds lose and lose, more and more people jump on
- Algorithms start to buy stock for people automatically, the stock goes up 50%, 60%, 70%.
- Even worse, people who lent their stock to the hedge funds, start wanting it back early
- And all of this costs the hedge fund money
- This becomes a snowball and now GameStop is up 685% in January alone
- At one point, that guy Roaring Kitty’s 53k investment was worth $48 million
- Hedge funds have lost over $19 billion so far on gamestop alone
- All of this going on with the trading sites like Robinhood, and TD ameritrade, stepping in and stopping the trading of GameStop and AMC
- Now there’s class action lawsuits
- Billionaires are crying
- But where does it go from here?
- Well, for the first time, people smell blood for the hedge fund instead of the other way around
- People are buying billboards (sounds like project payhem *wink) to try and promote buying Game stop stock
- One guy even bought a plane with the banner Suck my nuts Robinhood to fly over their headquarters
- And wall street bets should be renamed N’SYNC because they’re singing bye bye bye
- And I know what you’re asking – how do we fix people buying these stocks they don’t own on the back of dying companies only to line their own pockets and shut out the little guy?
- Hahahaha you’re not asking that? Hahahaha You’re asking if it’s too late to buy GameStop?
- The truth is…I don’t know, nobody fucking knows! This is the stock market!
- At the time of this video – there’s still around 50 million shares of GameStop being shorted
- People are once again betting on this whole thing dropping
- 2 GameStop hasn’t said anything
- People are speculating that they’ll announce that they’re going to release more shares at these high prices, to help stabilize the price of the stock and stop the squeeze
- All I know is that Wall Street and retail investors are asking the same thing.
- When will the Game. Stop.
