West and Sparks TIMED Podcast Ep 92: Hampire Forms Militia

WestandSparks

West and Sparks TIMED Podcast is here to give a slap on this beautiful Wednesday’s ass! For the first time in 2016, West and Sparks throws down a TIMED podcast that’s been built with your internet programmed, ADHD riddled brain in mind. The podcast itself can’t last more than 30 min once we start! Today we’re talking: Lincoln’s stolen hand job, how stealing power tools could lead to rectal surgery, and the latest type of Vampires! It’s the best episode we’ve done in 2016 – so give episode 92 of West and Sparks TIMED Podcast a listen!

Links!!

Mouth that Shit:

News That Matters:

REAL LIFE OR MICHAEL BAY:

Circumstances dictate a lot. Circumstances can be the difference between taking a bullet and giving a bullet. No bull. Sometimes, circumstances lead to the greatest slam-bang-adventure of our time! Not since Indiana Jones has a movie so boldly moved into the direction of epic adventure. Not only is this hero a real swashbuckler, he’s real handy in the what he does. Give this man a hand. He pulled off the greatest heist under the most impossible circumstances! Ya gotta hand it to him! It’s “Hand It Over,” starring Chris Pratt and Russell CROWE! Russell Crowe needed money. Chris Pratt needed a hand. Together, they dared to be handy!

Guess What’s Up My Rectum:

Starting off the new year right, I thought I’d shove something up my brown and tight. Stroll into Wal-Mart on the take, Stealing power tools wasn’t my only mistake. Seems that they’ve got camera and police that frown on that, and once in jail they check you with a pat. Police dogs barking at my ass, there aint no way they’re giving me a pass. Hospital x-rays shows what they’ve found, call it “Ms. Daisy” because I’ve been toting it around. After tobacco, marijuana, and suboxone I’m wondering if I’m still a virgin , because a man had to go inside and they call him a _______